Me so tHorny

So it's another glorious day in this wonderful world God has created for us. Or at least that's how I see it. I was going to start this post with another self depreciating list of my faults, but rather let's simply leave it at being a sinner saved by grace. I attended one of my alternate churches today. That is to say, one that is closer to home and doesn't require the drive to town. I have heard remarkable sermons delivered at this church, and I have to admit, I like the fact that they carry my hazelnut creamer. Today's sermon was good, but my overly critical ear bristled at a few things. Nothing all that alarming, as I consider my own spiritual walk to be full of likely heresy and contradiction. I was reminded again I fall short of being a good, lockstep Christian. This is nothing new to me(and God); we have few illusions over who I really am. I used to believe I was a truly "good soil" Christian, but I must admit that I am more akin to that seed that fell on the thorny ground. I am just too philosophically bound to my current place and time in this universe to forgo it and live only for my eternal reward. I like life in the 21st century. I enjoy being part of the world. I am captivated by the the vagaries in life, in all its diversity. This is not to say that I do not embrace the realities of Christ and His sacrifice for his creation. It is only to say that I have come to realize that I will ever be good enough or willing enough to lock myself within the confines of the church.

Today, the pastor made a comment that I think is not uncommon in the church. He stated that if a person was not fully dedicated to Christ, they didn't really need to waste their time showing up on Sundays. If attending church was simply a spiritual exercise, and perhaps I need to go home and rethink my commitment before wasting my time. I'm sure the message was intended to motivate me to examine my commitment and to improve upon my effort, but it rarely works for me that way. I simply hear the old "not good enough" message, and rather than improve upon my "not good enough" status, I hear a whisper in my ear that says, "See! You should just go away. You'll never live up". Fortunately, I recognize that that voice is the voice of a liar. You see, I know that my salvation is not based on my "goodness". It is not because I read my Bible, because my prayer life is so fruitful, or because I am God's favorite child. It is because after years of trying to make his children behave in those appropriate ways, God realized we just couldn't do it. So, He chose to do it for us. Perhaps before I am an old man, I will have rid my garden of the last of the weeds and thorns, or perhaps not. Either way, I believe my future with Christ is secured. I love Christ because he loved me first. I take him at his word that my salvation is assured. That's were I put my hope, that is my faith. A one last thought on thorns. Even though they were intended to humiliate him and cause him pain, my Lord wore his crown of thorns on his brow with dignity and honor befitting a King. He did not cast off the thorns of his life, but embraced them, and for this I am forever grateful.